{"product_id":"century-home-survivor-cotton-embroidered-38174","title":"Century Home Survivor Cotton Embroidered Hat One Size","description":"\u003cp\u003eNavigating the terrifying structural mysteries of historic property ownership requires resilience, which is exactly why the Century Home Survivor Cotton Embroidered Hat One Size was created. While buying an old house sounds charming on paper, the reality often involves crumbling parging, emergency plaster repair, and the terrifying discovery of outdated electrical rewiring. We have turned this shared homeowner trauma into a badge of honor. This minimalist, deadpan accessory is designed for the weekend warrior, the exhausted DIY enthusiast, and anyone who has spent entirely too much time in the plumbing aisle of a local hardware store.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCore Product Specifications\u003cbr\u003e\nConstructed to withstand the dust of a major demolition project or the glare of a neighborhood block party, this cap is built for uncompromising comfort and utility.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eMaterial Composition: 100% premium chino cotton twill, offering a highly durable structure without sacrificing a soft, broken-in hand-feel.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eStructural Design: Unstructured, 6-panel, low-profile design that conforms naturally to the shape of the head for a bespoke, comfortable fit.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCrown Dimensions: 3 ⅛” (7.6 cm) crown height, providing a modern, relaxed silhouette that avoids the rigid boxiness of traditional caps.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eVisor Details: Pre-curved brim providing immediate sun protection and a classic shape straight out of the box, requiring zero break-in time.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eVentilation: 6 meticulously embroidered eyelets strategically placed to ensure crucial airflow and temperature regulation during high-stress renovation projects.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eClosure System: Fully adjustable self-fabric strap paired with a premium antique brass-style buckle, allowing for a refined and highly secure fit across all sizes.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eUsage Context\u003cbr\u003e\nThe design features a classic, understated serif font that gives it the polite appearance of a historical society or country club logo. This creates a hilarious visual contrast with the chaotic reality of the phrase. It is the ultimate ironic accessory for standing in the return line at the home improvement center, attempting to repoint century-old brickwork in the blazing heat, or simply grabbing a casual coffee when you haven't slept well because you were worried about a draft. It signals to the world that you are doing your best to keep an old structure standing, and you deserve some respect for it.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eFulfillment, Processing, and Shop Policies\u003cbr\u003e\nEvery piece of gear in our catalog is custom embroidered on demand specifically for your order, ensuring strict quality standards while minimizing environmental waste.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProcessing Timelines: Please allow 2 to 5 business days for our production network to process your request, digitize the design, and precisely embroider your item before it undergoes a rigorous final quality check.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eShipping Standards: We utilize highly reliable carrier networks for all deliveries. Detailed tracking information is sent directly to your inbox the moment your order leaves the fulfillment facility.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eReturn Policy: Because we custom-make this item specifically upon your order, we do not process returns or exchanges for sizing issues or a change of mind. However, we stand entirely behind the quality of our apparel. If your hat arrives with a manufacturing defect or an embroidery error, please reach out to us immediately with photographic evidence, and we will make it right without hesitation.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHave Questions?\u003cbr\u003e\nIf you need any modifications to the thread color, require bulk ordering for your favorite contracting crew, or have any specific sizing inquiries, please send a direct message to our shop. We are always happy to help.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Evilwater Originals","offers":[{"title":"Black","offer_id":71105632469014,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7854","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Navy","offer_id":71105632501782,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7857","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Cranberry","offer_id":71105632534550,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_12735","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Spruce","offer_id":71105632567318,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_8745","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Dark Grey","offer_id":71105632600086,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_12736","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Khaki","offer_id":71105632632854,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7855","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Stone","offer_id":71105632665622,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7859","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Pink","offer_id":71105632698390,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7858","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue","offer_id":71105632731158,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7856","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White","offer_id":71105632763926,"sku":"6A0B11565065B_7853","price":58.0,"currency_code":"CAD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0691\/3576\/1430\/files\/il_fullxfull.8080620681_rbn9.jpg?v=1781597401","url":"https:\/\/evilwater-originals.com\/products\/century-home-survivor-cotton-embroidered-38174","provider":"Evilwater Originals","version":"1.0","type":"link"}